Don't worry- this post isn't as bad as the title would suggest. Unless you enjoy selfishness. Then...rock on! I have multiple goals for this year and thought attacking them all at once might be a pretty defeating tactic. Instead, I am going to focus on one big item per month and hopefully build on them each month. I don't want to brag but by the end of the year I should be pretty awesome. : )
I hate to follow sexist lines of thinking such as women tend to do this, or moms are this way. One of my (many) pet peeves is advertising or heaven forbid notes from school that specifically address moms instead of parents. It is just so insulting to fathers. Okay, I am veering wildly off course. My point is I am speaking only for me and my weirdo tendencies, though I do see a lot of women in the same boat. I tend to put myself last in life. When deciding what restaurant to go to, I ask what does everyone else want? If there is one doughnut left, I leave it for someone else to eat. My husband does not have this problem. If he wanted the doughnut, he would eat it. That isn't a criticism (and he would probably ask me if I wanted it first), but he is not shy about asking for what he wants. I need to be more like that.
It isn't about taking things from other people or putting myself first to the detriment of my family. However, I do recognize a need to put a greater importance on myself and the things that are important to me, Carrie, as an individual person. I will confess when I put this goal on my list, my first reaction was to make this a goal in February or March. This is the problem: I would always push it to the bottom of the list if it wasn't tackled right now. I'm thinking about the things that are important to me and carving out time to do them. I would like to travel more for fun this year and go at least one place I have not been yet. I'll probably start planning a long awaited trip with my sister and am planning a family trip to the beach. I am setting aside time in my week to blog and read and just plain relax. I may even go to that zip lining place I've been eyeing. ; )
Ooh, take me ziplining with you! And YES, we do need to get to planning our sisters getaway!
ReplyDeleteI love this goal you have set for yourself. Ironically I think I have the opposite problem--as an unmarried woman with no children to feed I don't have to ask anyone if I can have the last donut, metaphorically speaking. (Donuts themselves are usually not a temptation for me--chocolate chip cookies, on the other hand...) Since I don't have to share food/the remote/the covers/anything else at home with anyone I find myself being selfish when it comes to opportunities to share my time and energy with others. It would be easy for me to go a whole weekend without interacting with any other humans, but it wouldn't be healthy for me to do so (at least, not on a frequent basis!). Perhaps I need to set a goal for myself to be LESS selfish with my life.
That is a really interesting viewpoint. I've always assumed that some people (not me) think that singles are inherently more available to do things and that you were probably asked to do a lot more than a married with children person.
ReplyDeleteI'll need you ziplining with me to keep me from chickening out!
Oh, I do get asked to help with things frequently and I do try to help when I truly can, but I do also enjoy a lot of downtime, probably more than I actually need. I guess no matter what our status is in life it's hard to find that balance between time for ourselves and time for others.
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